I read letters

As a not very famous freelance writer I don't just get offered the oppertunity to write the biography of the hospitalized and slightly groggy citizens of Kelowna, no I also get email.  Come with me now through my email inbox, to see what sort of email a struggling freelancer gets.

From: Chance Shoemaker:

Greetings my friend. bro!

Are you my friend or my brother?  Why are you emailing me Neal, what's going on?

Do you want to be a king of bed? You will forget about all ED problems.

King of whose bed?  Do I get any farm land with this Kingship?  As for my Ed problems, look I'm sorry the show got cancelled too but really there's better quirky come-dramas out there now.

nowadays we want to offer you great choice of medical products  at the extremely low prices.
Hurry up!

Medical products?  Why didn't you say so?  I'm all over ordering drugs from someone claiming to be both my brother and my friend.  Had you just claimed to be my friend, or my brother, I would have been a bit dubious but now I'm in.

URL Removed

Okay, so that didn't go quite so well.  One day I'll get more email, and one day maybe you'll be able I'll be able to share it with you.  For now I'll just sit here looking at my empty mailbox, hitting the refresh button again and again.